STD's review of Wynn's

Location: Wynn's Burgers & Ice Cream

Date: 10/19/10

Time: 12:15 pm to 1:15 pm

Attendees: Rage, Deuce, Pete

Price: About $8 for burger, fries, and a drink

Double Deuce: Our team headed out for another exploratory adventure into the realm of spreading herpes critical knowledge about food. We were on our way to McDougal’s, only to find the place crammed full. It kinda reminded me of Hefty’s face that time he ate meat wiz. So we decided to go next door to Wynn’s.

Hefty Pete: At first glance it seemed pretty good. They have about 15 different kinds of burgers. I got a firehouse burger (jalapenos, cheese, hotsauce) and a BBQ burger (onion straws, cheese, bbq sauce). All the prices were reasonable and they had a lot of variety.

Rage: They even had hot dogs in a bunch of varieties as well. I got a burger combo and they even gave me half fries and half onion straws. I thought I would only get a small portion of each but I received a pretty large amount.

Double Deuce: While Hefty was prowling over the menu, I was searching for a place to drop one, if need be. The place was pretty average – simple logo, only 3 small dudes behind the counter, one TV in the corner playing Dora the Explorer, and quite a few empty tables.

Hefty Pete: The burger was good and each burger had 2 patties on it. But the patties were tiny, like 3 oz each or less. This made my power belly sad.

Double Deuce: I ordered a slaw dog and a burger. I agree with Hefty on the size of the patties, and my dog was small, yo! Last week I had a shriveled up chimichanga, now I have a small hot diggity. The Mrs. will not be pleased with this at all.

Rage: Yes, you do have a small dog Deuce. I tend to agree. But really, these hamburgers’s pale in comparison to a Five Guys burger or a Chef Paul’s burger. And for the price I was starting to get a little red in the face.

Hefty Pete: They had ice cream and shakes, which is a nice option. But for an additional $4, my cheap ass wasn’t going to order one.

Rage: Your telling me

Double Deuce: Why in the who-heys does Dora keep talking real loud and repeating things over and over? I can’t focus on my food because she keeps yelling then pausing for an answer! The real question is why are we watching Dora in a burger joint?

Rage: (I can’t stand Dora)

Hefty Pete: For the same price, I would have preferred to go to 5 guys.

Double Deuce: You would prefer 5 guys……in bed.

Rage: See my 5 Guys comment above.

Hefty Pete: This place just seems average. I don’t have anything spectacularly good to say. I don’t have anything terrible to say. Based on the burgers and fries alone, this place is easily forgettable.

Double Deuce: Where are we again?

Rage: It explains why it has changed owners and names in the past year. Nothing too exciting and I want $3 back for the 2oz of meat I did not receive.

Hefty Pete: To get pleasantly full, I would have needed to eat 3 burgers, or 2 burgers and fries. Which would come out to like 15 damn dollars! I don’t have that kind of cash lying around.

Double Deuce: I, as well, am not very full. The speed of service was good, but the food was pretty simple and lacking of substance. Combine that with an empty restaurant, toons on tv, and an average atmosphere and it doesn’t do much for me. It seems like they are trying to be a step up from Steak and Shake, but didn’t quite make the step.

The bottom line: If you’re looking for a place to get both a burger and ice cream in one fell swoop, this is the place for you. If you’re going to get just a burger, I can easily name 10 other options to choose before this one. Wynn’s is neither good nor bad - just average. And sometimes average just doesn’t appeal to the growing population of STDs.

Only 2 power bellies for this place - just below average quantity for Hefty

3 steaming piles for Deuce - average atmosphere equals average poo

3 out of 5 exploding heads - Rage walks away from this one only huffing and puffing slightly